It's my journal and I can whine pointlessly if I want to

NOTE: backdating this entry from May 8 to April 8 to make it drop off reading lists without having to make it private and therefore stop the existing discussions; I just don't want to start new ones right now. I'll fix the date a little later.

Spoilers for Civil War under the cut - I just learned that some LJ styles no longer show the cut text on the friends page. Sorry!!

I've spent most of today feeling gloomy after writing my previous Civil War post, having reminded myself of all the things I didn't like instead of focusing on the things that I did like.

As noted in that post, I didn't hate the movie; I had fun watching it! But I also feel like ... aargh, it's hard to describe. I noped out of the fandom last summer in large part because I was so unhappy and frustrated that the whole fandom kept talking about how much they'd hated AoU and predicting Civil War was going to be terrible, when I just wanted to be happy and enjoy the parts of AoU I liked and look forward to the next installment, and I ended up being bitter and angry all the time; it wasn't good. (Obviously there is nothing wrong with hating either/both of these movies; everyone's reasons were totally valid. It just really wasn't the fandom experience I wanted to have, and it was too ubiquitous to escape; at least it felt so at the time..)

But in the end, they were right. Civil War would've been a big disappointment if I'd gone into it with high expectations (though if you're after a fun summer popcorn flick, it was pretty good imho) and Infinity War will probably be even worse, since it'll have all the same problems AND THEN SOME due to having another bucketload of superheroes to jam in there. So I actually feel like I sort of owe the fandom a thank-you for accidentally harshing my squee hard enough that it didn't get harshed by the movie itself.

(Though I also kinda feel like I have now become part of the problem instead of the solution ...)

I'm not really going out of my way to look for reaction posts right now, but I did run across an interesting meta/reaction post talking about U.S. imperialism in the movie. (Squee harshing warning, if you're prone to that! The phrase "somewhere between morally bankrupt and ideologically horrifying" was used.) I don't agree with all their points, but it pointed out some things I hadn't thought about.

But anyhow, I'm sorry that my journal has turned into Squee Harsh Central, and I hope I'm not bringing people down.


Anyway, I decided to channel those feelings of gloom and overinvestment into finishing up a depressing and long-ish White Collar fic I started between seasons four and five. It was VERY close to being done when season five came along and jossed it, and I quit writing with something like 90% of the fic finished. And I just haven't been in the right headspace to work on it since. Tonight I got the damn thing done (with a certain amount of "wow, self, you were really bitter about canon when you wrote this, weren't you?"). So expect slightly-depressing AU WC fic from me soon, when I've had a chance to edit it. Yay?

It is fascinating to go back and do edits on something I wrote three years ago. The sheer quantity of WORDS I've been writing lately has made a noticeable difference to my general ability to put a sentence together.

This entry is also posted at http://sholio.dreamwidth.org/1080847.html with comment count unavailable comments.
Um, thank goodness I realised it was about the movie before I got too far, not seen it yet!

Just realised that's not your fault, it's that LJ no longer puts the text for the cuts on your friends page, only if I go to your journal do I see that! Stupid LJ! *kicks it*

Edited at 2016-05-08 01:08 pm (UTC)
It might be your style, my friends page and every other page still shows lj-cuts. :)
My friends page shows the LJ cut, but as an arrow, not as words. So I can see that it's been cut and have to click the arrow to see the cut bit, but can't see the text that has been used by the friend who is posting (ie 'Contains Spoilers'). I have to go to that person's LJ to see the text. But now that I know that, I'll do that for things that might be spoilery for this movie.
That's really strange! I still think it's something with the style on your flist, because for me on any page (flist or the person's journal) it does show the text. Hope you figure out a solution! :)
Oh no, I'm sorry! Knowing that, I'll start putting explanatory text outside the cut -- because yeah, I'm still using the old style and didn't know. Thank you for letting me know!
Of course, I've just realised that hovering over the arrow gives you the text *facepalm*

Kind of wishing I hadn't changed to the new style now!
So expect slightly-depressing AU WC fic from me soon,

Haha, as I'm still bitter about the end of that show, slightly-depressing AUs work for me in that fandom.

Sorry you felt this way (I didn't read the full reaction post but I did skim by a few things to get the general impression). I hope that fandom produces post-movie fic that will be enjoyable!
LOL. I'm off to post my depressing AU a little later! If I hadn't written so much of it and done so much development, I don't think I would have bothered finishing it, but I already had 20K of fic and it seemed like a real shame for it never to see the light of day!
Argh. I'm so sorry. I know that doesn't help, really, but I do hate when fandomy things just aren't "right" for people; IMO, fandom is supposed to be our safe space for enjoyment, and it's just no fun when it's not.

Awww, thanks! *hugs back* It's not that big of a deal; I don't know why it was getting me down so much yesterday. I'm feeling less bummed about it today, and am hoping to get back to focusing on things that make me happier.
Sometimes things just seem to hit us "wrong" at odd times, but I'm glad it's better today! :)