Sholio (sholio) wrote,
Sholio
sholio

This post has nothing to do with fandom, because I am COLD

This weather sucks. I had a mini-freakout tonight when I came home from work to find the fire was completely out in the boiler (we have a coal-fired boiler that heats the water that heats the house) and the house was freezing and I could not get the fucking thing to burn. For two hours. The problem with coal is that you can't just set a match to it; you need a fire of sufficient heat to make the coal combust. You are, after all, trying to burn ROCKS. And the boiler is outside, so I'm trying to start a fire in 40 below zero, where your fingers start hurting instantly when you take off a glove. I couldn't even get diesel-soaked cardboard to burn! Of course, the diesel was mostly frozen, which probably had something to do with it. You know that Jack London story To Build a Fire? Well, that's what I felt like. Only, minus the actual, non-metaphorical freezing to death. But I definitely felt like I was failing some sort of survival test if I couldn't even make a fire when I had access to a house full of burnable objects.

But! The coal finally caught on fire and the house is creeping up towards 60F (after I threw a screaming fit next to the coal pile, which was very cathartic but made the dogs terrified to come near me for an hour or two -- possibly because they were also familiar with the ending of "To Build a Fire"**).

**The protagonist tries to kill his dog so that he can crawl inside its carcass. From the look of MY dogs, that's exactly what they expected to happen.
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